Ahhh!! Congratulations!! The man of your dreams has finally gotten down on that shaky knee to ask you the most important question you’ve ever been asked. Without hesitation, with a glowing smile, and maybe a tear in your eye, you said the easiest “Yes!” of your life. For months, your boyfriend has been saving and planning this moment, and now he’s your fiance. The next question that looms is: Now what? Where do we start? What in the world do we do next? Keep reading for tips on our fourteen next steps.
Be Present in Your Journey
Before you even start thinking of every detail of the wedding, you need to take a step back to be present in this special moment with your partner.
1. Enjoy the Moment
Getting engaged is one of the biggest, most exciting, and most emotional moments in life. With that in mind, be sure to take time to enjoy the moment. Many people say they hardly remember the few hours after their engagement because it was such a whirlwind. We don’t want you to miss your own moment thinking about who you need to tell, what picture you want to post, or anything else. Take time to savor the moment with your brand-new fiance. Look at the ring together. Let him talk about what it was like doing the ring shopping, how he felt that day and his side of this journey. Be in the moment together, soaking up every emotion without worrying about anything or anyone else.
2. Take Lots of Pictures
Once you’ve soaked up the moment, take those pictures. Take lots! Your man will only propose once, and we promise you’ll want that moment captured. Those photos will be a treasured memory that you will smile at forever. Plus, when you tell your engagement story, having photos to show will make that moment come to life for your loved ones. So smile, pop that wrist, and take all the pictures!
3. Call Your Family
Before you tell anyone, call your family. Celebrate with the people who love you the most! You don’t want your mom to hear about your engagement from an Instagram post or from your best friend. Show respect to your parents and call them first. Let them see the ring and cheer you on! Your fiance’s family will most likely already know he was planning to propose, and they will be dying to hear how it went. With that in mind, don’t forget to call his family as well. Once your immediate family has found out, your parents and siblings can take it from there, spreading the word to aunts, uncles, and cousins.
4. Go Out to Eat
After you’ve enjoyed your moment, taken those pictures, and called your family, we highly recommend you go out to eat at a fun local restaurant. Order champagne and get some food to settle your nerves. The reason this step is so important is that it will give you and your fiance time to text and call your closest friends. There’s no worse feeling than forgetting to tell one of your close friends, and having them hear about your engagement from Facebook. When you sit down at the table, you will get to tell your server that you’re newly engaged, and it will make the moment feel even more real!
5. Post a Picture
While out to eat, and once your family and friends have been told, you can start thinking about your social media announcement. WIth your fiance, look through the pictures you took and choose your favorites. Make sure you choose one that shows off that ring! Together, you can talk about what you want that post to say, and then post away! We can promise that your phones are going to blow up with comments, likes, texts, and probably calls. Thankfully, you will be ready for it, because you’ve taken enough time to yourselves and you’ve already communicated with your closest family and friends. Enjoy the social media attention and appreciate how many people are excited to celebrate with you.
Start planning Every Detail
Whether you have been planning your wedding since you were little or if you haven't thought about it, now is the time to sit down with your partner to plan. It's important that you both discuss how you envision your wedding.
6. Come Up with a Timeline
The next important thing to do is to discuss a general timeline. You don’t need to come up with specific dates just yet. Talk to your fiance about when you’d like to be married. Narrow it down to a season. Do you want a summer wedding that can be outside? Do you want a gorgeous fall wedding with cooler weather and beautiful colors? Do you want an indoor winter wedding full of Christmas magic? Once you have a season, talk about the specific month and the year. Once you’ve narrowed it down to a month and a year, you can start to make more specific plans. If don’t have your heart on a specific date, that may work out in your favor! If you have some flexibility, you will be more likely to land the venue you really want.
7. Discuss the Budget
Talking about money is never fun, but it is imperative that you do. It can be an awkward conversation, but it is important to find out if either of your parents plan on helping with expenses. Most of the time, if they plan on contributing, they will tell you before you have to ask. If they don’t, talk with your fiance and figure out how you plan to bring it up to them, and try to either get a specific number that they’ll contribute or find out which pieces of the wedding they will cover. For example, some parents will just give you $10,000 and let you use it how you see fit. Others may offer to cover specific pieces, such as the DJ and the dress. However they decide they want to do it, the more concrete answer you can get, the easier it will be for you to begin planning.
Once you have talked to your families about contributions, then talk with your fiance about what a realistic budget. After you’ve done some research, try and set an overall budget for the whole wedding, and then piece down how much you want to spend on each individual vendor– the photographer, the caterer, the venue, the dress, the decorations, the cake, etc. Once you have this nailed down, open a wedding savings account, and contribute as much as you can to it.
8. Create a Guest List
Once you know your budget, you will have a clear picture of how many people you will be able to invite to your wedding. Obviously, the larger the wedding, the more expensive it will be. Sit with your fiance and figure out who you will have in your bridal party. Then, begin making your guest list. Think about family, friends, and who your parents will want you to invite, and collect addresses. It is important to get save-the-dates sent out as soon as you can, to ensure people will be able to make it to your big day.
Some of your most important guests will be your bridal party. Send out those asks as soon as you can, because you will need the help of your best friends and sisters throughout the process. If you don’t have a specific idea for how you want to ask them, look for a local company that sends bridal party ask-boxes. These are beautifully personalized boxes with small, thoughtful gifts. Your girls will love the personalized touch!
9. Make Your Website and Registry
Once you have your guest list decided, you’ll want to build your wedding website. You can add information about your ceremony, you can keep track of RSVPs, and you can create a registry. A wedding website will make your life significantly easier, so set aside a few hours to put it together.
While making your website, you can create an online registry. Open a bottle of wine, sit down with your fiance, and begin selecting items to add. Think about household items, decorations, and recreational gear to add to your registry. Also, talk about your honeymoon. If you’re going on a honeymoon, you can set up a cash honeymoon fund through your website.
10. Pick Your Wedding Bands
You have your beautiful engagement ring. The first thing to do is to be sure the ring fits you correctly. If it is too big or too small, take it in to be sized.
Once your engagement ring fits, you can begin looking for wedding bands. Talk with your fiance about the color and style of ring he wants, and ask if he’d like to pick out his own ring. Go ring shopping at your local jewlery store to let him try on different sizes and styles to find what he likes. With so much attention focused on the woman’s ring, it is equally important to find a special ring for the groom–one that he loves and will be comfortable and proud wearing every day. Grogan Jewlers, a local and experienced jewlery store, has a wide selection. You can search men’s rings by price, width, color, or material.
Equally important is to find your wedding band. A wedding band is a thinner band that goes on your ring finger and complements your engagement ring. It is given during the wedding ceremony during the ring exchange. Some rings are made specifically with a wedding band that snaps onto it. Take your engagement ring in to an experienced, local jeweler, and they can help you find the perfect style.
11. Go to Local Bridal Shows
The best way to get ideas for your wedding is to go to a local bridal shows. At these wedding expos, they will have all of the best local vendors–local dresses, local DJs, local florists, local photographers, and much more. You can talk with these vendors and see samples of their work. You can get estimates on how much they charge and ask about their availability. Hiring local vendors will save you a substantial amount of money, because you won’t have to pay for their travel expenses. Local vendors also have a deep understanding of your area, and have probably worked closely with all venues in the area. Going with local vendors will help ensure a beautifully smooth wedding day.
12. Go Dress Shopping
Get your girls together and go dress shopping. Keep an open mind, because even if you like a certain style, the perfect dress for you could be something you never expected. Dress shopping is one of the most fun and exciting parts of wedding planning, but it can also be exhausting and frustrating if you don’t find exactly what you want at the first location. Plan a day with an appointment at two or three different local boutiques. Schedule them with time to get coffee before you start, and to get lunch between appointments. Remember to relax and have fun, because this will be a day you will never forget!
13. Select Your Vendors
First and foremost, select and book your venue. Booking your venue and solidifying your date will allow the rest of the wedding to come to life. Choose your DJ, your photographer, your caterer, your bakery, your decorator, your planner, and your day-of coordinator. Once you have booked these vendors, they will begin to take charge. Good, local vendors will know exactly what to do and when to do it. They will ask you the right questions, and take lots of pressure off of your shoulders. The sooner you can get your vendors locked in, the easier your life will be.
14. Get Your Ring Cleaned
Before your big day, you want your ring to sparkle like it did the day your fiance proposed. After months of wear, your ring probably has some debris on it. Whether it is lotion, dirt, or anything else, your ring may not shine like it did. The week before the wedding, take your ring in to get cleaned. You will be shocked about how good it looks!
15. Be Sure to Ask For & Accept Help
Weddings are the most exciting and special day you will have, but the lead-up can also be stressful. Planning a wedding requires tons of time, effort, patience, and work. The best advice we can give you is to not try and do it all yourself. Take your friends with you to look at local vendors. Delegate some of the responsibility to your fiance. Trust your mom to take care of some of the details. Allow your future mother-in-law to be in charge of some of the communication. You are surrounded by loving, competent people who want the best for you and will be willing and eager to help, but probably don’t want to step on your toes. All you have to do is ask, and they will show up. Communication is key to ensuring a smooth wedding day, so involve your friends, family, and fiance.
Hire local vendors. Trust your local jeweler. Glow in the dress you love. Enjoy your big day. Most importantly, love your fiance and start your marriage out on the right foot!